The Glossies are not only the chic-est but also the most epicurean of Snow Tribes (see STYLE ALTITUDE Mountain Snow Tribes) when it comes to style
Unlike the bright and baggy, style-shredding Steezies whose natural habitat is the park, the glam and glitzy dressed Glossies are more likely to be spotted doing a spin around the restaurants. In fact, a Glossy’s idea of completing a triple cork is finishing three bottles of Cristal. And champagne powder? Well, it has nothing to do with the state of the snow.
While Techies have all the lastest gadgets, the Glossies have all the latest designer accessories. Techies could track their way out of an Arctic blizzard using the latest NASA Jet Propulsion Technology, while the closest Glossies get to a white out is co-ordinating white Swarovski studded Dolce & Gabbana goggles with their ermine-hooded white Chanel ski jacket.
It has to be said that Glossies love nothing more than perfectly groomed pistes and bluebird deckchair days. A black run is what your non-waterproof mascara does in the too fresh mountain air. In fact, Vogue announced that the quick answer to ski chic is 'don't ski'. The fashion bible declares, 'the outfits are puffy, the cold plays havoc with your skin - never mind the chaos of your hair'.
And, of course, you could break a freshly manicured gel nail putting on a ski mitt.
So while Gnarlies may revel in touring backcountry from hut to hut and living on adrenalin and energy bars, for Glossies, backcountry is a masculine place where beauticians explore with a vat of wax. And touring? In the Glossy world, touring is what The Oasis does in Aspen as the first ski-in, ski-out mobile champagne bar.
WHO: The Glossy Posse of piste-posing celebs and friends of Kate Moss and Kim Kardashian (above). Also, Aristo old money and Oligarch new money – Taras and Tatianas share high speed Swiss chairlifts.
WHAT: Fitted jackets, stretchy belts, tight and tapered ski-pants, one-piece suits, blingy shiny fabrics in black, white and metallics: gold, bronze or silver. Plus Paris pink (that's Paris as in Hilton not France). Also, this winter, a private zoo full of animal prints. The ski slope is the Glossy’s catwalk.
WITH: Fur (or faux) everywhere on: collars, hoods, trimmings, linings, cuffs, snowboots, headbands and Helmet Huggers (hats worn over helmets, USA style).
HOW TO WEAR: As dazzling as possible with sparkling diamonds, silver buckles, Also, Swarovski crystals and diamante even on their thermals - and even zingy white ski poles. Designer logo sunglasses or goggles are essential to avoid being style- blinded by your pals/comrades. Preferably mirrored lenses for applying your Crème de la Mer balm on the chairlift to cosmetically plumped lips - and that's just the men.
BRANDS: Bogner, Moncler, Fendi, Spyder, Napapijri, M Miller, Ugg, Dolce & Gabbana, Mou, Chanel, Toni Sailer, Poivre Blanc, S'No Queen - anything from Harrods ski department.
LEAST LIKELY TO SAY: 'Can't wait to go on a ski tour with just a backpack and sleep in huts for the next week.'
MOST LIKELY TO SAY: 'Can't wait all day for the gondolas, darling. Where's the heli?'